Whinge Whinge

25th February: It's Okay: Location: Melanie's Room

In advance, this blog isn't funny, quirky or anything of the sort. So if you're looking for entertainment, try again tomorrow.

The other day, I felt hurt. The worst thing about this hurt was that, it was this internal failure that related to me. It wasn't a pain that would go away like a cut or bruise, instead it was quite frankly a cemented pain, that there was something wrong with me. When people get upset with me, I really don't like it. For some-one to hold negative thoughts or feelings over my name, troubles me more than anything else.

You see, over time I've created many friendships with many different people. If you know me personally, you probably already realise that I'm a very easygoing person. I can understand that some days you just don't want to talk to me, or perhaps anything I do that day will irritate you. I really don't mind that - we're all human, I have similar days. So I let it go and get on with having fun with anyone who'se willing to have fun with me, but in the process of this, sometimes I upset people.


In my utter confusion as to why my attempts to be friendly cause conflict, some have said, perhaps it's because you're so friendly and open to everyone and anyone? Whatever it is, I'm not changing it, because regardless of the occasional hicups it causes between me and others, it's the sole reason why I have so much fun and friends that love me. I do feel saddenned, when people take things I do so seriously, when really, if they take a step back and a few deep breaths. The bigger picture shows that it really doesn't hinder us being friends.

I love who I am, how I'm honest with what I say, and how I can find the light side of situations, whilst still able to have serious moments when people need help. Who I am doesn't change, I can tend to have varying sides of me, roll call: Gemma/Melanie/Natasha, like we all do, that are appropriate for differing situations. Whether you want to share with me, the fun of being easy-going friends, or not, is essentially you're choice.

I just wanted to say, that I am always open to being friends again, why would I turn down a chance to have fun and to make a good relationship with some-one else? I do get angry when people are upset with me, I get angry because I can't see why we can't still be friends. However anger passes and I just feel sad and hurt that you don't wan't to have fun with me. Even worse, that you are thinking negatively of me.

But - in the end. It's you're choice, love me, hate me, whatever you want. I'll allways call you friend, or if I can't do that, at least say that we used to be friends and cherish our happy memories.

A little bit of everyone.